![FD25P00286 - [2025] EWHC 2175 (Fam)](https://backend.juristeca.com/files/emisores/logo_0FrGysm.png){kind=logo}
B Background
B Background
The father is in his late-40s and British. He is a businessman. He owns two properties in Portugal in a town, X. The mother is in her early-40s. She does not work currently, though she is a qualified beautician, and is a Brazilian/Italian national. She says she cannot work in Portugal without requalification.
The parties are not married.
The father has the equivalent of parental responsibility in Portugal as he was named on the birth certificate. It is common ground that he has the requisite rights of custody required for the 1980 Hague Convention.
The parties met in London in February 2020 and started dating. They met a few times before the Covid pandemic struck. The mother moved to Brazil in July 2020, before returning to London. The father moved to Portugal in 2022. The parties continued to have an on-off relationship with the father visiting the mother in London. It was on one of those visits, in September 2023, that the mother fell pregnant.
The mother says that the father’s response to the news of the pregnancy was very hostile. The father sent an angry and emotional text message to the mother in August 2023 suggesting that she take an abortion pill. His text message included the following phrases
“I do not want you in my life”
“You have plenty of time to take the tablet. That is your responsibility!”
“Do you really want a shit life as that is what will happen”
These would have been extremely upsetting text messages to receive.
The mother kept the baby. The father’s approach changed. In October 2023, he turned up at the mother’s home in London and proposed that the mother come to live with him in Portugal to see if they could make their relationship work. He demanded a paternity test, which the mother undertook demonstrating that he was the father. The mother moved to Portugal and moved into his flat. She did not follow the father’s suggestion of giving up her rented flat and, instead, has sub-let it.
The baby was born in Portugal and lived in town X until May throughout the first 12 months of her life.
It appears that the father’s behaviour was positive whilst she was pregnant. In her letter to the domestic violence unit in town X dated 17 May 2025, she said that before the birth he was “attentive and treated me well, which made me believe that we would build a family life”.
The mother says that his attitude changed after her birth. She says that the father was verbally abusive and would call her a prostitute and a whore. She says he devoted large amounts of time to playing padel (paddle tennis) leaving her with the baby.
The mother wanted a different type of life, but she says he would respond negatively to anything that she said. She says he would belittle her and call her “whore”, “dumb”, “loser” and “stupid”. She says she has suffered psychological damage.
She gave the following examples of the psychological abuse she says she suffered:
During an argument on 19 November 2024 the father called her a piece of shit and that the mother was “corrupting” the family home. The mother said he would undermine her “frequently” by undermining her knowledge of English.
On 31 December 2024 the mother travelled to Brazil with Q to see her family. She rang to wish him a Happy New Year and asked him to turn on a light on the video call as it was dark. He verbally abused her and accused her of being suspicious and shouted at her. The following day he texted her and called her a “crazy woman”; told her to “fuck off to being a brass (prostitute)” and that she had trust issues because her life had “been a lie being a prostitute”. The mother says she felt shattered by the comments. He threatened to kick her out of their home and demanded her address so that he could send her belongings. He told the mother that Q would grow up in a “shit world”.
The mother says that during this period he moved between asking her to leave the country with Q and abusing the mother verbally.
The mother asked the father to provide written consent to her departure and said that seeking the father’s consent to removal to England became another way to exert control over her.
On 24 February 2025 the father agreed to provide written consent to the mother leaving and he said “the quicker the exit the better”. But he did not give that approval. It is right to say that the mother said in a message to him that leaving wasn’t what she wanted, but she saw no other way out and “you are leaving us more and more”: she clearly wanted to make the relationship work.
On 27 February 2025 that father sent a message to say that he had consulted lawyers; that it was “fucking ridiculous” to suggest he would do something sneaky and that he wanted a “clean out” of the relationship. He said, “if it means missing my daughter everyday then I will make that sacrifice”. Q was just four months old.
In March 2025 he called the mother a “psychotic woman”, who he was “in prison” with, and a “borderline narcissist” who was trying to “ruin his day”.
The mother says that she was subject to the whims of the father’s daily mood
The mother complains that the father offered her money to leave Q and return to London alone.
On 29 March 2025 there was an incident that resulted in bruising. The mother had gone out with friends and on returning the father was angry. They had an argument when she suggested they relax and have a beer or go to a party. He shouted at her aggressively and pushed her, so that she hit her arm, and developed a bruise. He apologised the following day. The mother was upset and told the father’s stepmother about the problems.
On 19 April 2025 there was a further incident. The mother’s car tyre was flat after a night out. The father said, when called, there was no spare, and called her “an idiot” and stupid. The mother got a lift home from a friend, rather than the Uber the father suggested. The father then demanded to see her phone and an argument ensued in which he threw water on the mother, and she threw it back. He locked her in the bedroom. The mother says the photos of the car tyre suggested they were slashed.
The mother says that the father detained her in their home on 21 April 2025. He locked her in the house and took the key meaning she and Q could not leave. His explanation was that he detained her because that she had been drink driving although his text to her said “there are plenty of exits”. From that night the mother says he prevented the mother from sleeping in the same room as Q for 20 nights.
On 12 May 2025 the father said he would provide the requisite consent but recanted the following day.
On 14 May 2025 the mother contacted the Victim Support Centre in town X. She says she was too afraid to make a complaint when living in the father’s property.
The mother says she was completely reliant upon the father and felt isolated.
She registered her departure with the Victim Support Centre and left the country on 16 May 2025, flying to England. She did not have the father’s permission to do so. The mother texted the father to say that she had left. His response was angry. It is perhaps not surprising given that he said that the mother had kidnapped their children.
The mother appears to have been living in Air BnB accommodation as her flat is sublet.
The father has had some video contact. There has been no direct contact. In submissions her counsel said that it was not safe for the father to have direct contact. The father would like to have contact as soon as possible.
Both parties have made cross applications for a child arrangements order in Portugal. I am told that a parents’ conference, akin to a mediation session, is scheduled for 3 July 2025, that the mother should attend. The mother’s Portuguese lawyers have estimated that these proceedings will last no more than a year.
The mother has produced a psychological report based on four online sessions in May and June 2025. It specifically stated that “it is not a formal psychological assessment” and “that is not sufficient to reach diagnostical conclusions”. “Subjective signs of anxiety were observed” and the mother states that she feels there will be negative impacts on her emotional health if she moves. There is no evidence from any medical practitioners in Portugal.
There is no evidence of any abusive behaviour directed towards Q herself. But the mother says that she has been exposed to harm through her parents’ relationship. She says that Q has been exposed to domestic abuse and a high conflict environment and carries the signs of tension, often shouting or screaming.
The father made a police report in Portugal. That report dated 16 May 2025 said that he “feared for his daughter’s well-being and safety because his partner is not psychologically well and is an emotionally unstable person”. He applied for residence.
The mother expressed anxiety that the father was seeking a sole residence order, but he assured the court, through counsel, that he was seeking a shared residence order and did not want to remove Q from her mother.
The mother has obtained some assistance from lawyers in Lisbon as to the enforceability of protective measures. I discuss these below.