ZZ21D58773 - [2025] EWHC 1659 (Fam)

The parties three children are aged 21, 19 and 16. The youngest is, of course, my primary consideration but the older two are still part of this family. It is quite clear to me that both parties have always wanted the very best for their children. All three were born at a private hospital and all three have attended private schools. All three have had problems with education and all have at various times been invited to leave school. W described this as expulsion. H was at pains to present is an invitation to leave. It seems to me that this is a distinction without a difference.

A lives with W. She was asked to leave her school in 2020. She was home schooled successfully by W. B, the middle child, has been diagnosed with severe ADHD and mild dyslexia. He has found the breakdown of his parents’ marriage very difficult. He has exhibited severe anger, frustration and fear. He was asked to leave his school in 2018 and boarded for a year at a school elsewhere. He was asked to leave that school in 2019. He too was home schooled by W and was able in that environment to achieve acceptable GCSE results. For a period he worked as an apprentice for H. This broke down after less than three months following an altercation between him and H. Until July 2022 he was living at home and neither working nor attending college. In July 2022, he began an apprenticeship at DEF. In about December 2023, H rented a flat for him in London. He lived there for about four months and then returned to live with W. At some point this year, he had a serious fight with C at home. A called the police. Since then, B has lived with his girlfriend. W believes that it is likely that B will return to live at home soon. I have no reason to doubt her belief. C, too, suffers from ADHD. He has been asked to leave school and is currently being home schooled by W.

Save for the brief period that B lived with H, W has had the lion’s share of the task of looking after the children since separation. It has clearly not been an easy task. Unfortunately, that task has been made more difficult by action taken by H since separation. During the period that H was reducing and restricting funds available for W, he made significant gifts to the children and paid them very high sums of money either directly or through DEF. In the period from October 2021 to July 2023, A and B received over £50,000 each and C received almost £20,000. The payments have continued since July 2023. A and B had company fuel cards. W’s was taken away by H. B received a Rolex worth about £20,000 for his GCSE results. A was given a £13,000 bangle for her birthday and a Mercedes. B received a Land Rover Defender. These are just a few examples. I find that H deliberately made these payments to the children and gave them these gifts to humiliate W.

When I come to consider the outcome of this case, I will remind myself of the significant contributions W has made since separation to this family by providing as stable a home for the children as she was able, in circumstances where H chose to take action which undermined harmony in that home.